crazy antelope

Becca e-mailed this to me from Kigali a few days back....I am cleaning out my in-box and thought you might enjoy. It totally made me laugh....



Vive l'Afrique....

side note about passports....

To be filed in the "in case you're interested" file, as I exited South Africa last night I inquired about the passport issue that delayed me for two days in Nairobi -- see two posts below.

The customs official I spoke with last night looked at my passport and said that the US Embassy had actually sent their customs desk a letter, a couple of months ago, that authorized the S. African customs officials to put visas on blank endorsement pages. Endorsement pages are at the back of your passport....different than visa pages; I didn't know this, and never paid much attention, and it turned out to be the reason I wasn't allowed to board the flight to S. Africa. I was told there that endorsement pages could not be used for visas, and therefore I had to stay behind in Nairobi and get blank VISA pages inserted in my passport before I could go. Mind you, I had SPACE for visas in my passport....just no completely blank visa pages left. I did have two blank endorsement pages.

The customs agent last night said that they don't talk to the airlines to inform them of this type of update, and most airlines still think that those endorsement pages can't be used for visas. Yes, I told her, I had experienced that first hand! She said eventually the airlines will realize. Great. And in the meantime? :)

The funny thing in all of this -- or maybe the normal thing, depending on how you look at it -- is that I was prompted several times to simply thank God for the circumstances and leave it at that. Admittedly I didn't FEEL very thankful. I was so disappointed to be left behind! But I did stop and thank Him. it's weird in circumstances like this -- I automatically think I did something wrong, or haven't been listening to God or obeying Him like I should, and so God was trying to punish me. And that's so NOT like God, to dole out random punishment and expect us to figure out where we're not quite hitting the mark. It's also SO like me, to fall into this pattern of thinking that God is some celestial Scorekeeper and I didn't quite meet His expectations, so He needed to give me a nice little 'shape-up-or-else' wrist slap in the form of a missed airplane. Now, THERE's something to be very thankful for, that God IS NOT like that -- I have to (sometimes continually) remind myself that it's not so much about circumstances themselves as it is knowing God's presence (or at least, believing God's presence) in the midst of the circumstances. Anyhow, I'm rambling now. I mentioned below that when I was telling Bear this story, he was really great; after very kindly empathizing with me he suggested maybe this is just preparation for a possible future of international travel. And then he said, "At least you got to visit JP & Clementine!" Which is true - I missed visiting them on my way into Rwanda last year b/c of the post-election violence, and I do wish to point out one more time that they totally rescued me in Nairobi. This was wonderful of them, and all went smoothly, and I am so so thankful to them for their kindness. (Thank you both again, for your hospitality....!)) I am here in Nairobi all day today, but they are in Rwanda, so I would have missed them completely had it not been for the passport problem.

I read an advent devotional the other day, about the cost of worship -- what it cost Jesus to worship (obey) His Father by coming to earth to die, and what it may cost us to worship, too. Worship is sometimes painful, the author pointed out. Maybe someday I will be a little quicker to worship in whatever circumstances I find myself in. And in the meantime, I am very grateful today that God is a whole lot bigger and better than I often remember.

Merry Christmas everyone! I can't WAIT to see you....

anyone got a donkey? or a goat will do....

Since I have time here in the Nairobi airport, I am catching up on emails, and this made me smile.

A little background: I am included on a big email list of ex-pats in Rwanda, and a variety of requests, announcements, prayer requests, etc., come through on a fairly regular basis. I hope I can stay on the list even though I have departed, because it will keep me connected to the happenings there for a little while longer.

Anyhow, here's the email -- and Kay is totally serious:

Hi everyone,
I wanted to send out a request about a donkey.

My Sunday school class is planning a drama for the end of March or early April and we are in need of a donkey to use as a prop for just a few minutes at the beginning of the play. Does anyone have a tame donkey we could use? Or do you know someone.

The biggest problem is the owner would need to get the donkey to the church on time and then have someone to take care of it and take it home, so I know this is a BIG request, but I think it would make it nice for my kids in my class.

If not a donkey, then I guess we could use a goat. Did they travel with goats during the periods of the Judges????? This will be a play about Ruth and linked to Easter as Jesus is our Kinsman-Redeemer.

Last, I am attaching the Bible memory verses as two people have asked for them. They are a Word document.
Thank you again,

Sincerely,
Kay

There were probably very few people in Rwanda who received this email who thought it was odd -- in fact, probably no one thought twice about it. And Kay will probably find someone who's willing to loan their donkey for her play.

I am going to miss Africa!

travel woes!

I am supposed to be in Zambia right now with my dad!

Unfortunately, on Saturday night, the same day we left Rwanda, I got stopped at our gate here in Nairobi as we were boarding our plane to South Africa because apparently I didn't have enough blank pages in my passport.

I was aware of the fact that I needed at least one or two blank pages in my passport to get into South Africa, the airport we had to fly through to get to Zambia (which we also had to exit, because our flight arrived late at night and our connecting flight left the next day, so we were spending the night in S. Africa). The last time I'd checked, I had had three blank pages (I thought) but two were Amendment/Endorsement pages, which apparently aren't accepted as blank pages. Wow, I wish I had known....!

Oh, it was a horrible moment. The plane was boarding, and the flight attendants wouldn't let me get on the plane until I got more passport pages. It was Saturday night, and I of course couldn't get to the US Embassy till Monday (today), and then there was no guarantee I'd get extra pages right away, and then there was no guarantee I would get back on a plane to Jo'Burg on Monday night...... In the meantime, my dad had arranged this great trip together....just horrible.

The worst part is, right now you don't actually need a visa to get in or out of South Africa (at least not as an American). So there is no reason why functionally I needed more pages in my passport; it's just a general rule for visitors to S. Africa. Argh!

Anyhow, I told Dad to go on ahead, enjoy the trip to Zambia (sniff!) and I would figure it out and catch up with him. I have amazingly wonderful friends in Nairobi, thankfully, and (although I wasn't so sure how I could contact them, and I hated to bother them) I assured Dad of this and told him I'd be okay. He hesitated and then went on, particularly when the flight attendant told him he'd incur stiff penalties for re-booking his flights. He's actually having a good time there (we've been in touch by email), which makes me happy.

Honestly, God has taken great care of me here -- my friends in Nairobi were leaving on Sunday to go to Rwanda, but they blessedly and generously rescued me on Saturday night, gave me the keys to their house, hooked me up with a friend of theirs so I could even go to church on Sunday (Nairobi Chapel is GREAT!), and then hooked me up with a driver so that I had someone reliable and trustworthy to take me to the Embassy this morning and then back here to the airport. Thank you SO much, my dear friends, if you are reading this - JP & Clementine, you are the best, and I hope I can return the favor one day!! I don't know what I would have done without you....

I was able to successfully get visa pages this morning and am now booked onto the flight tonight. Lord willing, I will meet up with Dad tomorrow. I am now in de-adrenal mode and am getting very tired waiting for my flight!

What a crazy experience. I haven't handled it all that well! I sat down and cried after Dad boarded the plane and I was waiting for the ticket agent to direct me toward the appropriate customs agent. You know, I would like to say that after this time overseas, I would have a little perspective -- after all, far worse things can happen, and are happening, to people all over the world -- but self-absorption really runs deep, I'm afraid!! Bear was really sweet when I told him what happened, and after some email empathizing (he's still in central Asia right now) said that maybe this is just training for overseas work. :) If that's the case.....please pray for me! Ha, I have a long way to go.

Christmas is coming!

This video caught my attention (thanks, Laura J!). Have you seen it?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eVqqj1v-ZBU

After being over here for a year, this video makes my heart break.

My dad arrived in Kigali three days ago (tangent below). After our travels together in Rwanda over the past few days, he remarked that what struck him the most was how things that seem so important back home suddenly seem so unimportant.

We went off the beaten path a bit, out into the rural areas and villages, and I had forgotten how uncomfortable it can be, how unsettling....Dad was great, smiling and waving, conversing with locals when we stopped the car, speaking some new Kinyarwandan words and trying out his French (which, charmingly, he has been studying for the past few months in preparation for this trip). But he still expressed that he was a little apprehensive to be so far from paved roads, and familiarity, and anything resembling the structures and systems of safety and security from back home. He mentioned how he couldn't imagine living ten miles from the nearest paved road, like the countless villagers we were bouncing past, over the dirt roads.

And then there were other things that were surprising, too. While we were out on the back roads, we stopped to verify directions. Nobody speaks English out there, so I just said "Musanze?" (our destination) and the villagers crowded around the car and pointed in the right direction (thankfully there's only one way to go, out there). Before we took off again, we offered a lift to a woman with three children, one of them an infant ("Lifty?" is the word I used to ask her if she wanted a ride, in case you wondered). What startled Dad was that, a ways down the road, when the woman indicated to me that it was time to drop her off, I stopped the car but she didn't know how to open the car door. She started hitting the inside of the door with the palm of her hand. I had to lean over the seat and lift the handle so she could get out.

I am curious what you think of the video....

(tangent, from above: Yay!!! It's Dad's first time ever to Africa! He actually got delayed for over 12 hours in Nairobi, and as a result got upgraded to first class for his flight into Kigali. To top it off, he sat two rows in front of Mia Farrow, whom he recognized but didn't harass too much, he says. She asked him what he was doing in Rwanda and he told her he was coming to visit me....but to the frustration of everyone in Kigali to whom he related this story, he didn't have a chance to find out what she was doing in Rwanda because he was in the way of other passengers, being in the aisle and all. Anyhow. End of tangent.)

PS: I am writing this post from the Nairobi airport, and I'm hoping to post more in the coming days. Dad and I are traveling a little bit together through different parts of Africa before we return home to Colorado right before Christmas. Thanks so much for your prayers. And also, thank you for your prayers for help to wrap things up well here in Kigali! It was so sad to leave today, and it also didn't quite seem real....I'll have to write more about that later, though, as our flight is about to take off. I can't wait to see many of you really soon!!

Crazy (blonde?) antelope / travel update

Dad and I met up just fine in Johannesburg last week, and had a wonderful time together traveling! I am back in Nairobi airport now, on my way home (yes, this is beginning to feel like my second home...especially because I am here for 16+ hours today!!). But no complaints...at least I am booked on a flight, got through passport control okay, etc., etc. I am missing Rwanda but so looking forward to being home with my family for Christmas (Lord willing, if weather permits. I hear there are bad storms in the northern/central US....). We'll see!! Nothing I can do about it, so I am determined to enjoy the journey at this point.

I'll try to post some photos from our trip on Facebook, as soon as I can free up enough space on my hard drive to download my photos from my camera (!). In the meantime, in the spirit of African safari, here's a short video that Becca forwarded me from Kigali about a week ago. I laughed out loud when I saw it -- I think I watched it here in the airport, actually:



It means even more now, because Dad and I saw lions, and giraffe, and impala (kind of like African antelope) over the past few days....we even saw a snarling lion pride fight one another as they tore into a fresh kill (a water buck). Wow, what a show. But we didn't see any blonde antelope. Maybe next time. :)

a practical side of hope

I was talking with my twin sister yesterday, and she asked if I was going to update this blog and tell about my "wrapping up" activities here in Rwanda.

I wish I had time!! It has been a whirlwind few weeks trying to tie up loose ends, mostly at work, and even now there are a few of those loose ends still flapping in the breeze of goodbyes.

I will try to write more later on tonight, and post some photos of the really special good-bye parties that have been happening here (it's in the culture, to have goodbye parties, and it does really make you feel special, wow).

Talk to you soon. I hope. :)

World AIDS Day - taking action

Please join World Relief in commemorating World AIDS Day today, December 1st.

For more information about what World Relief is doing around the world to join in the fight against HIV/AIDS, please check out the links below:

Winning the battle against AIDS in Cambodia: http://community.wr.org/Page.aspx?pid=1306

HIV/AIDS in Livingstonia: http://community.wr.org/Page.aspx?pid=1313

Abstinence pledges soar in the face of AIDS: http://community.wr.org/Page.aspx?pid=1312

And here are two simple ways for any of us to take action:

The Alive Campaign - Now is the Time to Act
Add your name to Integral's message to the United Nations Secretary General, Ban Ki-moon. World Relief is asking all of its staff to participate. For more information and to sign, click here.

And pray!! God hears, especially on behalf of the poor and suffering. Please join me today in taking a few minutes to pray for those who are suffering from HIV/AIDS. It's a disease that has many faces.

I have a dear friend in California, Austin, who is an actor and humanitarian worker and aspiring nurse, and who is HIV+. He has the privilege of living in the USA and embracing life and living it to its fullest, and he lives his life with a strong faith in a loving God, and he's an inspiration to us all! But I know it's not always easy for him.

Then I think of the widow Christine that I met here in Rwanda, the one who was dying of AIDS and was facing incredible hardship, but whose face shone in the darkness of her little mud hut when she talked about the goodness of her Jesus.

Then, there are thousands of children every day, innocent children, who have either been born with HIV or who will lose a parent to the disease. Children. How can they understand that it's not their fault, that they're not forgotten, that there is still a God who loves them very much??

Thank you for your prayers for each and everyone, and that God would dwell near to each hurting heart.

Happy Thanksgiving from Kigali!

It's Thanksgiving! Not really, here in Rwanda, but I feel nostalgic today for family and pumpkin pie and Cool Whip and Thanksgiving Eve services at Ev Free, and (yum) candied yams...

So in honor of Thanksgiving-that-is-happening-half-a-world-away, I am sitting here during my lunch hour thinking about how much there is to be thankful for. And honestly, I'm getting a little overwhelmed, and even beginning to feel a little uncomfortable because I know I have been blessed with so much.

Then, I remembered a great conversation I had with one of my dear friends and beloved mentors, Sue, back in June.

I was sitting in her living room and telling her how I felt so completely blessed and humbled at this season in my life by God's goodness, and I just was trying to think about what I could do to thank Him, to try to show Him just how thankful I felt.

She smiled a little bit, and said, "Yes, we often do want to DO things for God, don't we, especially those do-ers among us."

(If you don't know, that's me, a possibly textbook do-er. Sometimes I try to hide it, but it's true. Sue, of course, knows this very well.)

Then, with a voice full of warmth and compassion that I've come to love and cherish, she said, "Maybe He just wants you to receive His blessings with a thankful heart. And just be blessed. Maybe that's what He wants."

Her wisdom, like it always does, sailed into my heart like a deep breath in a wide open space. There's nothing wrong with doing things for God. It's just, sometimes, it's not what's required, is it? There's plenty of time for turn-over of blessings, for us to seek to bless God, to seek to bless others. But it's okay to let it happen when it happens, and not force it to happen. It's okay sometimes just to delight in His blessings. It's okay sometimes to just...be....thankful. Sometimes that's more than enough.

Sometimes I can hardly believe that's God.

You know, I love stars. I really do. I actually have some personal history with stars, even....embedded in the story of my past, there's something important in there about stars. Now whenever I think about the stars, they remind me of God, and His power and greatness and BIGness. But for some reason as I've been writing this quick entry, I started thinking about the stars, and it suddenly hit me that the stars don't DO anything. They're just...stars. And that's enough to inspire praise, and thoughts about God, and thoughts about God's goodness.

So this Thanksgiving, while my natural bent is to, well, DO something, instead I'd like to just...be...thankful. And my God, I pray that in this, You will be glorified.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!

(PS: I love you, Sue!)

Thanksgiving....

I know it's a day early (and we don't even celebrate it here!) but I wanted to express my thanksgiving for a beautiful friend of mine here in Rwanda.



Baraka (whose name means "blessing" in Swahili) is really an exceptional person, committed from her heart to serve the needy around her. (And in case you're wondering, she doesn't usually wear a red head covering like the one above! It was a gift from Bear when he was here.)

Before I left to go see Bear, Baraka was collecting clothes from anyone who wanted to donate them, and then she held a type of yard sale in her village, selling the clothes at a very inexpensive price.

For those who could not afford to come buy clothes, she made an offer to others to make a donation to the yard sale, and then she would give that donation to needy people in the community to use toward buying clothes.

The purpose of the sale was to raise money to pay for health insurance for needy children in her community (the government has a national health insurance plan that costs about $2/year for a child....but some families can't quite afford that, or have too many children to pay for all of them). It turns out that Baraka raised enough money to cover the cost of insurance for several children in her community....I'll find out how many exactly on Sunday. Awesome!! I was especially happy because the research findings from earlier this year showed that the number one reason families don't take care of their sick children in a timely manner is because they don't have health insurance.... Baraka, you are wonderful!

I also want to request prayer for Baraka's fourth lay counseling training this year, being held this week. As part of her ministry, Gate of Hope, she has been hosting a series of trainings for 15-20 Rwandans who want to learn to help others work through psychological needs, trauma, etc. This training week is always a busy but fruitful week for her....I know she would love your prayers. Here's a photo of her from the training back in May:



Baraka, thank you for being an inspiration to us and for serving those around you -- you are a blessing to us all.

there and back again

If living in developing countries is going to be a big part of my future, I do wonder if it will ever become less strange to board a plane in a place like, say, Kigali, and get off a plane in a place like, oh, London.

The contrast is always kind of baffling. I have to prepare myself for it in my head, on the plane, somewhere in the airspace above the developed nation I'm about to visit, or I just get a little overwhelmed when I take steps outside customs and I can suddenly do something crazy like actually use my credit card (not an option in Kigali, in case you visit). And then, there are all these stores....I can buy a toothbrush (in case I, um, happened to leave it behind - why do I always do that?) or a bag of chips or a magazine in English, or a KitKat. It's so....bizarre.

It was no less bizarre this time (and yes, I did in fact forget my toothbrush, yet again, and was grateful that they are easy to come by in Heathrow!). From London I headed north on the train to a place called Shropshire, where I was to rendez-vous with Bear and his recently evacuated colleagues. There was a serious security incident in the country he was working in, targeting his org and people in his org, so the board ordered everyone out. The whole group, including board members, had gathered for a debrief and planning-for-the-future retreat there in the UK.

It was an honor to meet all of Bear's colleagues -- families, singles, older, younger -- who had simply been seeking to serve the less fortunate in a way that would honor God and bring blessing to others. It wasn't an easy time for them, as many were making decisions about their futures in ways they had never foreseen when they had started their journey of service. But there was a definite sense of God's presence and it seemed that we could just feel that many were praying for the group. It was a total privilege for me to be there, and I'm thankful for the opportunity. And I guess it goes without saying to say that it was completely wonderful to see Bear, and what's more, in a relatively safer place than he's been for a while! It was so sweet to be with him there.

After the retreat, Bear and I spent a little time on vacation (I had the time set aside already at work, as I had been planning to visit Bear for a while....just not in the UK!). I confess I felt a little bit guilty for taking this vacation, but it was really good to do it....it was a good time to process things through a little, and just spend time together after a fairly stressful month.

We found inexpensive flights to France and spent some time in Normandy, a region featuring Calvados, brie, William-the-Conqueror chateaus, and Mt. St. Michel. It's also a countryside shadowed in memories of D-Day. (Incidentally, there is a really lovely new museum at the American Cemetery at Omaha Beach. If you're in the area. The stories of heroism and honor are beautifully told.) Here's the cemetery close to sunset, and a photo of the main monument from the direction of the new museum:





The nice thing about Normandy in November is that it is relatively inexpensive for a European vacation. If you're wondering, we somehow managed to bypass Paris (tres cher, even in November)! But Bear found out I am secretly waiting for him to kiss me under the Eiffel Tower so hopefully some day, maybe post-marriage, we can arrange that....

We shot through London again on our way back to our respective countries (Bear is going back to central Asia until the end of December, actually, just not to the same country) and Sunday morning we were able to attend a service at Westminster Abbey (which was lovely, if not a bit...drafty! I got really cold!). But besides that, it was really a beautiful place and the chaplain spoke about who rules our lives, or what rules our lives, and how the world might be different if Love Incarnate truly did rule our hearts. Before leaving London, we managed to eat fish and chips and a drink a pear cider (for you, Dad) at an appropriately monikered place near the London Tower called "Hung, Drawn, and Quartered." Mmm, British humor. I mean, humour.

I am back in Africa now for my final 3 weeks, and I have hit the ground with both feet running. Actually, I need to get going as my lunch break is over!! I need to email many of you and will try to do that today and tomorrow (thanks for your emails!). Also thanks for continued prayer for Bear and others from his org, as well as a specific prayer request from Bear for the in-country nationals who were left behind in the country that his team had to leave. May the work multiply now. Thank you!

checking in!

It has been, I confess, a difficult three weeks here...but it has also been, at times, encouraging, fascinating, heartbreaking, and exhilarating. I haven't posted regularly for so many reasons, but here is a run-down of the goings-on around here lately:

It's hard not to start with a tragic and sorrowful event that has colored the last few weeks in a singular way and has been somewhat alarming at a personal level....except for I can't really write much about it here on this blog! Security issues. Bear has had to leave the country he was working in because of a senseless tragedy that occurred to one of his co-workers. Please do send me an email if you'd like more info. And thank you all so much for your prayers during this time...I can't even begin to tell you how you've encouraged me. It's been kind of scary.

I was supposed to go visit Bear next week where he was working (a planned trip for quite some time), and now instead I will go and join him and his co-workers in the UK, where they've evacuated and are doing debrief. In fact, I am en route as we speak, typing this in the Nairobi airport and hoping that in a minute I can catch up on some personal emails I owe some of you.... I am SO looking forward to seeing him and also meeting the people he's been working with, although I confess I wish it were under different circumstances.

Another difficult situation has arisen in the past 10 days just across the northwest border of Rwanda, about two hours from here by car, in the Democratic Republic of Congo. Hundreds of thousands of refugees have been fleeing their villages and trying to survive in makeshift camps as fighting has broken out between rebels and government soldiers in this area. But, like many other African conflicts, "rebels" might actually be a mis-nomer, as this group of fighters claim that they are actually protecting their people against Hutu militants whose antics the government forces have allegedly failed to adequately address. There is a long and complicated history here, and Rwanda is involved in a unique way because of the ethnic component to the conflict. For more information, here are two news articles:

http://edition.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/11/05/labott.foreign.policy/index.html
http://edition.cnn.com/2008/WORLD/asiapcf/11/05/afghanistan.civilians/index.html?iref=topnews

We have been praying a lot for an end to this conflict, and supernatural intervention seems to be the only hope at this moment. WR has an office and staff in Goma, a town very close to the fighting, which adds a personal element to the unfolding tragedy. Last week, we actually were able to host at our house a family of girls from Goma whose father, Amos, a WR accountant, had to travel to Uganda. Amos knew it wasn't safe to leave the girls behind while he traveled, so he brought them down to Kigali.

With much laughter (which was either a defense mechanism or simply non-cohesive emotional response, or maybe both?) the young woman told us stories of how they had been hiding under the kitchen table for two days while they heard shooting and grenade explosions not far from their home. They said they were scared, but they would sing and pray and then stop when they heard explosions, and then they would start again.

Beyond the terrible circumstances that led them to us, they were a delight to get to know and to spend time with. Here they are singing the Congolese version of Happy Birthday to Phil:



In other news, something I haven't shared yet on this blog, the results of the PhotoVoice activity from a few months' ago is proceeding in a new direction. From the start, I really hoped and desired that these young people would take ownership of the results of the initial project, especially since my time here is up at the end of this year. Perhaps about 6 weeks ago I was able to help the young adults select a leadership committee and then I went through a foundational lesson about relief vs. development with them. I also explained that since I wouldn't be in the country long-term, I wasn't going to be able to lead any more activities, but I could help out where I could.

Well, how many ways can I say that I am SO proud of them? They have completely taken the initiative, arranged to meet together weekly, and have come up with a project involving all of the young adults at their church. Their plan is to help 20, and eventually 40, of their most impoverished neighbors plant home gardens, so that these families will have fruits and vegetables year-round.

What's more, they wrote a letter to Interior fellowship back home in CA requesting funding for fruit trees -- the young adults here wanted to give one fruit tree to each poor family as a gesture of good will. The very cool thing was that in one night, Interior raised almost twice as much money as was requested for this project....yay Interior! Of course, that's the very generous and giving spirit of that group; I guess I can say safely that I'm not too surprised! But if you are from Interior and reading this, on behalf of the young adults here, I'd like to say THANK YOU. :)

We started planting seedlings together last week, and (don't laugh, please) I got another chance to hoe. You might remember the last time I did some hoe-ing was in the Philippines, and everyone laughed at me, I have no idea why.

The good news is I think I'm actually getting better. Honestly. Perhaps I'll be a farmer.



....And here are some of the young people showing me how it's REALLY done....



More shots of the day:





In the past three weeks, there have also been some positive developments in the work I've had the privilege of being involved with this year. The research project has been successfully terminated, the key behavior change message workshop yielded a whole set of what we hope and believe are culturally sensitive behavior change messages about child health issues, and now (via the MOH) WR has been tasked with taking the lead on the application of the messages in the community. This basically means creating training modules for community-based health workers. There's a lot of work but it's been interesting so far (my role has been to work on counseling cards, which are simple tools for community workers to use with their neighbors). What a year -- I've learned so much and feel very thankful.

Okay...over and out. I don't know when I will be able to blog next, but I'll do my best. I am looking forward to getting caught up in person with many of you, in just a couple of months! Wow! Take care for now... - C

Inspiring story

Hi - I just saw this great story about an East Africa refugee on CNN.com (link below), and it reminded me about the power of forgiveness. This woman didn't let herself be poisoned by unforgiveness, and instead saw a miraculous chain of events unfold when she chose to forgive...

http://edition.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/10/16/heroes.sarandon.mapendo/index.html

I read these types of stories and always want to ask myself afterward if I'm holding on to any unforgiveness in my life, you know? Letting go of past hurts and anger can be hard, but not nearly as hard as carrying them around with us, I think.... and nothing is impossible with God.

Encouraging news about child survival in Rwanda....

Over the weekend I was down in Kibogora again (this time for work, although yes, I missed Bear not being there!). I snapped the above shot on Tuesday morning, during a child nutrition meeting for mothers. The mothers in the background are washing their hands and the hands of their children in preparation for eating the (nutritious, balanced!) meal they had prepared in the house behind them. Props for handwashing, and for mothers' nutrition meetings! Here these gatherings and habits can actually be life-saving practices.

Related to this, while I was in Kibogora I was also working on my final report for the research project results, and I read some exciting news while I was going through the hot-off-the-press, newest version of the Rwanda Demographic Health Survey (DHS). The Rwandan government puts out a new DHS every two to three years, and the survey examines the most pressing health needs in the country.

Here's the hopeful news: while in 2005, 1 in 7 children here in Rwanda were dying of preventable disease (malaria, pneumonia, diarrhea, etc.), in early 2008 (the survey was conducted from January to April), only 1 in 10 children were dying of preventable disease. So the child mortality rate has now dropped from 14% to 10% for children under five years old; that's the lowest rate since 1992, pre-war days, and the rate appears to be dropping even more.

There are lots of factors contributing to this drop; country-wide health interventions such as the one pictured above are just one factor among many. And of course there is MUCH work still to be done (1 in 10 children is still an unacceptably high rate....). But here in the child survival community, we are delighted to see the numbers moving this way. Thanks for rejoicing with us!! I was reminded to thank God for the ways He has and is answering prayer on behalf of the most vulnerable children in this country.

about the ring, and a few other things

Hi everyone --- first, I just want to thank you SO much for your sweet comments and your emails of encouragement....I feel so so so blessed by you. Wow, thank you. :) I will try to respond to each of you personally very soon...thanks for your patience as I am battling somewhat spotty internet and trying to catch up with work (Bear left today...so it is back to work for me!).



I forgot to tell you more about the ring (photo above)!! (Jen D and Chris B, thanks for the first reminders...just what I would expect from stellar wedding photographers!).

After we talked about it, a ways back, Bear and I had decided that a diamond alternative was the right thing for us, and an aquamarine turned out to be our stone of choice. The significance of an aquamarine is partly geographical (it's a popular and precious stone in the country where Bear works), partly financial (it's affordable while still being beautiful) and partly symbolic (an aquamarine symbolizes faithfulness, courage and friendship, three qualities we pray characterize our marriage and future life together).

The symbolic meaning of the color blue also has a Biblical meaning symbolizing heavenly grace...something that we have been given over-abundantly, can never do without, and know we need lots of!

And finally, the aquamarine is named from "aqua marina," which means "sea water," and in folklore the aquamarine was a symbol of security and safety during travel (across the seas). So even though we don't travel BY sea today, the significance was still, well, kind of appropriate, we thought, for overseas travel.

The band itself was custom-made in the US (isn't it pretty? wow!) and it actually crossed the Atlantic twice (because of re-sizing) before it was tucked in a pouch around Bear's neck and made the journey into Africa. This ring should have frequent flyer miles attached! (If you happen to be reading this and you were a ring courier along any part of the way...thank you so much!). The stone too saw some mileage; it was mined in Bear's country and then shipped across the border for polishing before coming back, only to be shipped off to the US for ring completion.

So, that's the ring story. :) I have some traditional Rwandan marriage-related conversation that you might find to be interesting, but that will also have to wait for another post. For instance, engagements don't happen here the same way they do in the West, so when I tell Rwandans that "I got engaged" this week they aren't nearly as excited as westerners are. Anyhow, more on that later.

Again, I do regret that we haven't been able to touch base with each of you personally to share our news...thank you so much for understanding!! After a few days of rest (and the proposal!) in Kibogora, we headed north to visit some good friends and colleagues, and when we got back to Kigali we had a rushed few days of visits and socializing with friends here before going north to spend quality time with some mountain gorillas (pictures to follow in a later post). We finished off our trip as the very blessed guests of Baraka and her family, and Vic got to meet some precious friends at church this morning in Gasabo. All this to say that we haven't been very close to internet (and therefore, skype) very often...the fastest way to share our news was to blog and go the un-preferred route of the email blast...

I look forward to catching up with each of you....thank you again for your notes of encouragement! xo

Yego means Yes :)

After a crazy crazy busy month here (hence the lack of recent posts!), Bear came for a 10-day visit!! Actually, he's still here. And I am so excited to share....we are engaged!!

We spent a relaxing four days out in Kibogora at one of my favorite places in Rwanda, a quiet and lovely mission compound with a beautiful view of Lake Kivu and with a rich history of compassionate missionary activity spanning back at least 70 years. It's always fun to see old friends there (you probably know I've been out there several times already this year because of work that WR does in that region), and it's a fun place to be to meet new people who are staying on the grounds (there are a few different houses where guests can stay).

Bear and I arrived at the mission compound on Thursday, and for a few days spent time relaxing, catching up with one another, enjoying the scenery, and spending time with other guests as well as with Sheila (a British woman who runs the mission and who's been there for 25 years!). It was such a nice time to unwind from a busy work schedule and just spend time together.

On Sunday Bear and I took an early-morning walk to watch the sunrise, something I've never done in Rwanda. It was a beautiful, clear morning, with a slightly cool breeze. We walked through the nearby village of Kibogora and up a hill at the end of the road, where we had a great view of the hills across the valley over which the sun would come up. The sky began to lighten and brighten in front of our eyes, and we chatted and took photos as we waited for the sun to appear. I found out later that Bear had planned to ask me to marry him then, just as we watched the sun poke out over the hilltops across the way. But Bear noticed (and I had noticed also!) that our hilltop watch also happened to be the location where the villagers came to fill their jerrycans every morning with water from the nearby water pump, and the line for water was getting longer every minute. And while they waited to get water, they began to form a semi-circle around us, out of curiosity to see what these two muzungus were doing there! So for the sake of privacy Bear changed his mind and decided to wait!

After watching the rays of sun peek over the horizon, and after snapping a few more photos, we headed back to the mission compound for a quiet and peaceful breakfast on the back porch of the place I was staying on the mission compound. Our view looked down out over the lake, and as the sun began to shimmer in the waters and the world around us continued to stir and awaken, we reminisced about the way God has led our friendship and our relationship, and talked about the future ahead.

I remember thinking, 'Wow, I hope he asks me now....this would be perfect.' But then it actually got a bit more perfect, as Bear took my hand and began to pray, thanking God for His leading and blessing, and praying for God's guidance for the future. And then he got down on his knee, took out a beautiful, delicate aquamarine ring (more on that in a minute), and asked me to marry him... I paused, just taken up with the moment and a little bit awed at how this was really happening, so thankful for all God had done and was doing..... And then I said yes! A lot of times. In a few different languages. :)

So, that is the story. Bear is an amazing man and I feel so blessed to be with him. We didn't have good internet connection for three days after that, so we couldn't tell any of our far-away loved ones (you!) right away. And we would also have preferred to tell you individually! But thanks for letting us share the news this way. And we are so excited to share the news! I have to go right now to dinner but I will share more later.... Thank you all for your love and support!

IRS is not what I thought

I am swamped with data analysis from the research during the past few weeks, and I am in the midst of preparing for our upcoming week-long workshop (we'll be using the findings from the research to develop appropriate messages targeting the communities). BUT I wanted to share with you a few photos from the past few days (this may be it for a while, until I am un-swamped!):

First of all, due to limited staff availability I was tapped to attend the annual IRS launch in a nearby health district. (I admit that it was a little tough to be pulled away from my desk and workload...but this is for the team!) At first I thought, IRS? What? But here, IRS stands for Indoor Residual Spraying, and is part of the (US) President's Malaria Initiative (PMI) to reduce malaria incidence in countries where malaria is endemic. (Rwanda is one of those countries.) The Rwandan Ministry of Health also has a malaria-reduction program, so together the governments have aggressively been tackling the problem. IRS is one component of the approach used to reduce malaria incidence here; it's pretty self-explanatory, i.e., homes are sprayed with an insecticide, so mosquitoes carrying the malaria virus are killed when they land on walls that have been sprayed. The IRS program is one example of our US tax dollars at work, and it is exciting to report that since 2005, malaria prevalence here in Rwanda has been reduced by 40%! In addition, while only a year ago 40% of overall caseloads in the health centers were related to malaria, today only 15% of health center caseloads can be attributed to malaria. Yay!! This means fewer child deaths too, of course, as the majority of malaria deaths in Rwanda occur in children 10 and under.

Here are a couple of photos of the event yesterday, which included a big ceremony and then the inaugural house-spraying (pictured). While the chemical spray (a DDT derivative) is harmless to humans once it's been sprayed (and it's environmentally safe, for those of you who wondered), it's still toxic while being sprayed, so the sprayers are well-protected:



Here's the house that was sprayed:



Secondly....this is a random shot from last week, out in Nyamasheke. There was a huge vaccination campaign in Rwanda last week, in fact. You will be happy to note that twice a year the government has been sweeping the country, vaccinating every child, administering Vitamin A and Mebendazole (anti-worm medicine), and counseling families about family planning methods. Here are moms and children proudly displaying their vaccination cards:



Finally, the President of WR is here in town, staying at Phil and Becca's, and the other night some WR-Rwandan staff were over for dinner. Becca decided to serve Chinese food, for fun, and the staff learned how to use chopsticks. Some had never used them before, and they were very fast learners (they didn't want to eat with their hands!):



Talk to you again soon, I hope...I'll do my best to keep in touch here! Hope all's well back home....

PhotoVoice (thanks, Interior!)

I was going to write about culture shock today, but I think I'll leave it till later. In case you wondered if I ever experience culture shock here, I do....and as I recently came to realize, sometimes I don't even realize it! But maybe that will be tomorrow's post.

Today, I want to share how the PhotoVoice activity has been going at Baraka's church.

PhotoVoice is a community development tool I learned about while earning my MPH. The activity itself is simple: send small teams of community members (usually youth) out into their local communities with disposable cameras. Instruct them to take photos of both the needs they see in their communities, and the strengths in their communities (also known as community assets).

This is a quick tangent (if you prefer to track the main point of this blog entry, please skip to the next paragraph, where the main point continues!): whenever I see the word "asset," I have to smile, because it reminds me of Bear. This is because one of the first movies we went to together was the third Bourne movie (Ultimatum? or Supremacy? I can never quite keep them straight) where one of my favorite lines was, "Eliminate the asset." And now I can't see or write or say the word 'asset' without thinking of that movie, and then thinking of Bear, and then smiling. It's like a little gift from God, that word.

So. Back to the main point. Where were we? Assets. (Smile.) After the youth take photos of the strengths and assets (smile) in their community, the photos are developed and handed back to the teams. The teams then use their photos to create a presentation about the needs (and assets!) they discovered in their community in the course of taking the photos, and then all the teams share their presentations with one another. Finally, the groups brainstorm together ways that they can help meet the needs in their community (using their community's assets[!], where possible).

There are layers of purpose to the activity: besides just a tool to raise awareness and reach out to serve the local community, the activity is also designed to empower young people to believe they can make a positive difference in the world around them.

We did the PhotoVoice activity together in Baraka's church this past month (while I was home on weekends I helped introduce and facilitate the activity to a group of young adults, and while I was gone during the weeks, they forged ahead, taking photos, creating presentations, etc.). Right now, we are at the brainstorming stage; the young adults have finished presenting their photos to one another and are now thinking and taking time to pray (their suggestion!) about what needs God would have them to prioritize in their community, because they discovered a lot of different needs.

I want to thank the Interior adult fellowship at Ev Free Fullerton for providing the disposable cameras for this project....you have played an important role in a project that is still growing, here in this Rwandan community. Special thanks to Baraka who didn't think twice about doing all the translating necessary in order for the project to go forward. And thank you all for your continued prayers, that God would continue to use the young adults in this church to impact the world around them and make a positive difference in the lives of their neighbors. I feel certain that God smiles at this, as He sees these wonderful, motivated, and amazing young people being light to a dark world.

Here's a photo of the young adults at the first meeting:


Here are a few shots of some of the teams, with their cameras. Each of the groups had a team leader and they each had a team name (I don't have the list of team names with me, but they had names like "The Good Samaritans" and "The Five Brothers")







Here are a few shots of the teams presenting their photos to one another:







The needs that the young adults identified in their community ran the gamut. One group took this photo, explaining that this was an unmarried woman who had three children, by three different men. All she wanted out of life was to find another man and have more children. The group identified "family planning" as the need, stating that it wasn't good to birth children you couldn't care for, but they also understood that this woman was looking for love in all the wrong places. Understanding the love of God through Jesus' love for her could dramatically alter this woman's whole pursuit in life:



Another group identified the reaaaaaally dusty main road as a big community problem:



Still another saw that child labor was a big issue:


Other needs listed were: weeds everywhere, lack of care of grounds/property, drunkenness, young children taking care of even younger siblings, street children (b/c of single mothers), one-room home (for 7 children plus the goats), men over-eating while their hungry children stood behind and watched, two men fighting while others stand around to watch and clap, wasting food instead of giving it to others who are hungry, no graves for the poor -- just for the rich, too much food of bad quality, a local beggar who is dirty and eats anything, local people who have disabilities, smoking, no latrines, malnutrition, stagnant water that encourages the mosquitoes, cooking from dirty pots, inadequate facilities for pre-school, and mis-use of water by those who have too much of it.

The assets (smile, sigh) in the community were: kids in the community playing sports together, kids coming to church together, small businesses succeeding in the community, children washing themselves, and children working well together to solve problems.

Thanks again for your prayers of support....I am looking forward to seeing how God will be using the young adults at Baraka's church to address some of these needs that they have identified. During our last meeting, we talked about how God Himself, and His love and power, were HUGE assets(!)....much opportunity lies ahead to change the world around them for the better. :)

Back in Kigali....

Hi everyone! How've you been??! Hope you're all doing well and enjoying the last few weeks of summer. You might be like me, asking yourself where in the world the summer has gone to.... I think that's either a sign that we've been working too hard, or playing too hard....or maybe both! Here, I think it's been both.....

It's been a month since I've had time and/or working internet connection to blog! But thank you for your prayers while I've been out on the field for research...everything went fairly smoothly (and when it didn't, God opened other doors!). I had a great time getting to know the researchers better (there were 24 of them), and together we learned some interesting things about care-seeking behaviors for children, among Rwandans. I'll blog about it a little more later....I really want to share some of the things I learned with you all. We're analyzing data now to prep for the next step of the project.

While I've spent much of my time out on the field in the past five weeks, I have been 'home' in Kigali on weekends. However, three of those four weekends, my good friend Jennifer from the USA has been in town and so we were busy running around Kigali and getting caught up on life in general...it was great to have her here. :) She was a blessing with some research she's conducted here as well, in child abuse (some sad stories emerged from her research...I'll tell you about this later on, too). I've also been busy on weekends with a PhotoVoice activity with the young adults at Baraka's church....again, I'll write an update soon! But thanks again to Interior at Ev Free for facilitating this project...yay!!

Many of you have asked about Bear. He is doing great, working on language learning, enjoying mid-day tea and political debate with the locals (also a good way to work on language!), and starting in on some medical work and clinic supervision as well. He's got another wave of community development trainings coming up later on in the fall. Bear is adjusting really well to his new life there and his balanced perspective about serving and working overseas in his conditions really encourages me. (Not to sound like a broken record, but) more on that later, too.:) Thanks for your continued prayers for him.

Mainly I wanted to just give you an update that I'm back in Kigali. Hope you're doing well there, too! Thanks for your encouraging emails and notes; it is always great to hear from you. And just for fun, here's a shot of Jenn and me and the young adults from Baraka's church involved in PhotoVoice....they are great!

bear update & photovoice

I wanted to thank you all for praying for Bear. Bear said thank you too! He is doing really well; he had a great week facilitating a training-of-trainers workshop, and he's diving headlong into language lessons now. He's planning on doing a little bit of travel in the upcoming days, just a little bit east of where he's living now, with the head of the organization he's working with.

A funny thing happened at a get-together here last night, at a friend's house. I ran into a family that I'd met back in March (haven't seen them since; their daughter is here in Rwanda, and we don't cross paths too much because of our busy schedules; her parents live back in the States and happen to be visiting her again).

When I met the family in March, the mom had told me about her husband, how he had lived for a while in the same central Asian country where Bear works, and how there's a whole support network in the USA for workers in that country. I had forgotten about it until recently, but maybe last week I remembered our conversation and was interested in knowing more. I had even gone to Facebook this week to try to contact their daughter and find out more info from the mom....and then what do you know, I end up at a party with the mom herself last night. :) Do you believe in coincidences? Me neither.

At any rate, it was great to get connected with the mom again (and the rest of the family, too, actually....they are quite an interesting family). Through her I hope to connect up with the support network in the USA, who actually has yearly meetings all over the country.

Today I am looking forward to hanging out with the youth from Baraka's church for a few hours...we're going to do PhotoVoice together! My adult fellowship back home, Interior (shout out to this awesome Ev Free Fullerton gang!) supplied disposable cameras for a group of teenagers here. So today, after we go through the good Samaritan story together (the teens will do a mini-drama for one another), the teens will receive a camera. We'll talk about camera care and photography etiquette (and also just basic picture-taking skills, since many may have never used a camera before). Then they'll go out into the community in small groups and take photos of the various needs they see. They'll also take photos of things that they're proud of in their community, and thankful for.

Once the photos are developped, we'll get together again and the teens will sort through their photos and present their work to one another. Then all together, they'll decide on how they can help to meet some of the needs that they identified in their community, how they can show mercy and compassion in a tangible way, to serve those around them on behalf of the One Who has showed us so amazingly how to serve. Thanks for your prayers!! And thanks again to Interior for supplying the cameras!! I'll keep you posted.

praying for Bear

I am really thankful for all of the people out there who read this blog (and pray) and stay updated on my life over here in Africa. What a huge blessing. :) It is encouraging to get your notes of support and to hear you say that you've read the blog and are praying. Thank you thank you.

So, because you are a faithfully praying crowd, I wanted to request prayer for the 'significant other' in my life, a really incredible guy, who from now on I'll refer to as "Bear" on this blog. I'm calling him Bear instead of his real name because (as many of you know) he's working in a volatile place overseas, and taking precautions about identity-protection is a necessity. In fact, I've removed previous blog pages that refer to him here. Many of you know him, or have met him....and if you haven't, I do hope you will sometime soon.

Notwithstanding, Bear needs prayer! (Oh, that rhymes. Smile.) Last week, Bear was traveling from the US out to the country where he'll be working in central Asia for the next six months (email me and I can tell you which one exactly if you don't know already). He was scheduled to arrive there the same day that our research training began, and toward the end of the training, I got a text from him telling me that he had safely arrived in the capital...and that he'd supposed I'd heard already about the bombing that morning, in that same city, where over 50 people were killed.

Honestly, I almost started crying and then realized I couldn't really cry at the training. It was kind of a weird feeling. No, I hadn't heard about the bombing, although I was glad he was safe in his residence, and so happy he'd contacted me himself before I'd read about it online or something. Now, he's been in-country for about 10 days, and during that time there have been at least four other altercations with associated casualties that I've been reading about, mostly in the southern part of his country, so not close to where he lives, but still. And kidnappings there, even in the capital, especially of foreign workers like Bear, is not uncommon.

So thank you for your prayers! There are so many needs in his country, and unfathomable social and cultural complications and conditions. Together with nationals and expatriate workers alike, he is essentially doing community development work, making himself available to make a difference in the lives of those who are most vulnerable, especially mothers, children, and the poor. But we know that ultimately prayer is what will make the biggest difference. Would you please pray for him? Please pray that he would be a vessel to bring love and hope into the hearts of people who have little reason to believe in love or hope anymore. Please pray for his safety in-country, for him and for all his co-workers. I'll find out if he has any other specific requests for you too. THANK YOU again for your prayer....

4th of July in Rwanda

I meant to post this over a week ago: here's an evening photo of the brand new (as of February) US Embassy here in Kigali:



There was a reception on the evening of July 3rd at the Embassy for NGO leaders and other in-country Americans, to celebrate the 4th of July. Then on the 4th, there was a big picnic on the Embassy lawn for Rwandans and Americans alike (again, Rwanda celebrates Liberation Day on July 4th, so it is a dual-holiday for Americans living in Rwanda).

The Ambassador is giving a speech in the photo, at the podium, and while I don't know what exactly I was expecting from his speech, I ended up being really encouraged by all he shared regarding how Rwandans and Americans are partnering together to help the country grow....everything from harvesting methane from Lake Kivu (which would ensure Rwanda's energy independence), to building a gas pipeline into Rwanda from Nairobi, to investing in real estate, to just simply building relationships between individuals from both countries.

After reading Darrow Miller's "Discipling the Nations" last year, I had to smile to see how God-given concepts like "freedom," "independence," "hope," and "future" were all evident in the Ambassador's speech as he described the spirit of the work going on here in this country. In spite of all the struggles here, a sense of hope does pervade the country, and there are many wonderful things happening, at many levels of society. The spiritual aspects of development embedded in the social aspects are striking at times. All the same, I continue to pray that while Rwanda develops as a nation in a way that honors God, the poor and destitute here in the country will not be forgotten. There are still so many needs that go unmet, so many children that go to bed hungry, so many people sleeping on a dirt floor at night and barely scraping by. Thank you for your continued prayers!! And may God get the glory.

research update

Thanks so much to all of you for your prayers! Last week was a blur but I was so proud of our team of 24 Rwandan researchers and all that they accomplished! By the end of the week, we had completed a refresher training in qualitative research, tested three different types of questionnaires in three different health topics, and (in twelve teams of 2 researchers) conducted 72 interviews with community members about child health. Whew. :) We have a break now for a week (a break from research, not from work!) and then we pick up next Monday in Nyanza (south), where a team of 12 of us will conduct another 72 interviews. The following week we'll be going north, to Musanze (near the gorillas!).

Here are some of the researchers playing a game during the training on Monday (Fidel, the one leading in the center, is the king of little games to keep everyone alert and focused):


Here are Chantal, Anitha, and Esron reviewing their questionnaires:


Here are Beatrice and Eduard at a local health center interviewing a mother about newborn and maternal health care practices:


Thank you again for your prayers...they made all the difference! "Unless God builds a house...." (or energizes a research project...) And I so appreciate your continued prayers for the upcoming weeks. We have A LOT of work to do, will be doing much traveling, and will need much favor from leaders and help to find the right people to interview. Thank you for your prayers for God's protection, guidance, and leading. And again, overall, please pray that God might use the study results to impact child health here in Rwanda to His glory.

I am in Kigali all this week and I hope to post a few more items. Talk to you soon....

work update from Rwanda...

It has been a while since I have written an update on how the actual research is going for the child survival program (the original reason I came here!). Perhaps now is the time!

You may or may not know this, as I have shared with many of you in person how things are going, but my original research project morphed from a focused study on newborn health into a more broad, "formative"' research project inquiring into cultural and social norms surrounding child health in general. It's a long story how this happened exactly (the morphing of the research project) but the short story is that the World Relief child survival program that I work with is working in partnership with the Rwandan Ministry of Health (MOH), and the MOH needed this formative research project completed. Because I was here this year, already doing research, and because the MOH research encompasses newborn health research, and since the MOH research helps to achieve certain goals of the World Relief child survival program this year, and since it was a great opportunity for me and for the World Relief child survival program, it made a lot of sense to give up the original plan for research and switch to this project. I am so thankful for the way things worked out, actually, and am hopeful that, by working with the MOH, the research results will have a broader impact than originally planned.

Quick background: there is a national strategy here in Rwanda to mobilize health workers at the community level, using volunteers where possible, to help prevent child deaths (particularly deaths caused by preventable disease: malaria, pneumonia, diarrhea, and malnutrition). However, the Rwanda MOH wants to have a standardized set of key behavior change messages for community health workers to be able to disseminate to their communities. The Rwandan govt wanted research to be conducted to specifically address the barriers (as well as facilitators) of appropriate health behavior in the rural poor communities (i.e., find out why parents DO take care of their children properly, and why they do NOT....is it ignorance? just pure poverty? traditional beliefs about caring for children? social constraints that prevent prompt care?).

The research I will be conducting will seek to find out what these barriers and facilitators are, here in Rwanda in a rural impoverished setting. Then, using a standard public health behavior change framework, my team and I will be devising key messages to deliver to these rural poor communities that will be targeted to fit the social and cultural norms, based on the research results. God willing, these messages will be used by the MOH's partner organizations (like World Relief, for example) in future child survival programs.

Thank you for your prayers for this research! I have been planning this for a while now, and there have been some considerable logistical delays, but tomorrow I begin with conducting a training (in French, yikes!) for 24 Rwandan researchers, and then Melene and I will be busy through the middle of August, traveling all over Rwanda, to collect data and then to design the messages.

I would love your prayers that the research team and I would be able to conduct the project ultimately to God's glory (i.e., with excellence, professionalism, kindness, compassion)....and that in the end, children would be positively impacted by the work. Would you also pray that the design of the messages would be very useful, in a practical way, for organizations like World Relief to use in the future here in Rwanda? Thank you so much. :)

I will try to keep you posted on how things go with the research, although I'm not sure what my time constraints will be, nor my email access! But I so appreciate your prayers!!

Also, there is a lot going on with so many of you this summer! Many of you are traveling, some are changing jobs or taking on new responsibilities....others are encountering new challenges (or the same challenges!) of day-to-day life! I am praying for you too and am so thankful for you all. I love getting your emails and would love to hear from you if you have a chance. xo

two Rwandan holidays this week

Awareness that America is not the center of the universe came slowly for me.

I think the first time this really sunk in was when I was a teenager...and it happened during an experience related to holidays.

I had moved to Canada right after I turned 17, and for a while I didn't notice any big differences between Winnipeg, where I was living, and, say, North Dakota (which I had driven through). Really, Canada was almost exactly like America, the way I saw it at first...

But then, my ignorance intersected my first experience with national holidays that weren't my own. Thanksgiving comes early in Canada, in October if I remember correctly, and it is celebrated on a Monday, not a Thursday. And there's no football. A month or so later that year, American Thanksgiving sailed right on by the Canadians....nobody stopped working, nobody ate turkey, nobody passed out from tryptaphane.

That's when I began to feel like an outsider.

July 4th was similar: nobody in Canada stopped working, had watermelon in the park with the extended family, or rushed to fireworks shows. But they didn't need to: they celebrated their own way, on their own day (July 1). They didn't need to celebrate July 4th too.

Growing up with a love for holidays (and holiday traditions), these shifting holidays and celebrations made me think about things I had never thought about before: different countries have different histories, different stories, than my own country's. What an epiphany. And as I came to this realization, I also became a little embarrassed... Why hadn't I realized this before? It was kind of a signpost for me, an understanding that the world was bigger than I had imagined up to that point.

Rwanda has her own story, and this week two national holidays are being celebrated: Independence Day (July 1) and Liberation Day (July 4).

Independence Day dates back to 1962, and was established to celebrate Rwanda's liberation from Belgian colonization. Belgium colonized Rwanda at the turn of the century, and was responsible for many of the ethnic tensions that resulted in some of Rwanda's national scars and tragedies of post-colonization years.

Liberation Day (tomorrow) marks the end of the 1994 genocide, and the end of the 3-month mourning period. I asked one of my Rwandan friends which holiday was more significant, and they said July 4th, "because it is more recent. The other is old."

Like every country, Rwanda's holidays open a window into her history. Thank you for your continued prayers for the hope and the future of this nation.

jogging, digressions, and Henri Nouwen

A friend (thanks, J!) emailed to me a book passage by Henri Nouwen right before I left to go home (already over a month ago, wow), and I was thinking about it this morning when I was jogging.

Before I continue, however, a small digression: I do want to share something that I always have meant to share about what it's like to go jogging in Kigali. When I was here two years ago, I wouldn't have felt comfortable going jogging, mainly because I was living out in a rural area where it was completely obvious that nobody jogged and I didn't want to create one MORE difference between me and the people I was living amongst (skin color difference: check; hair color difference: check; language difference: check....that, and more, was enough for one summer). I have since learned that there are many muzungus like me who live in rural areas who go jogging every day, and think nothing of it, but it just wasn't what I felt like doing. Maybe if my trip had been longer than six weeks I would have tried to figure out something.

Anyways, I am digressing from my digression (Victor and I call this "the web." Victor speaks linear-ly, in straight lines, and it is very easy to follow along, straight to the point he is communicating. I, on the other hand, speak tangent-ially, hitting one tangent, then another, then another, and finally will sometimes make it back to my main point. Maybe. Victor is a wonderful listener and I would like to publicly give him a ton of credit for patiently following along my web of thoughts, although I admit there are certain appropriate occasions when he very kindly tells me that he needs me to make my point. I asked him to do this, actually, and every so often he does, and that is just another thing I really appreciate about him. It's better than just tuning me out, which is the alternative, right? In fact, some of you right now, especially you Henri Nouwen fans, are wishing he were helping me write this blog entry, I know it.) Where was I? Oh yes. Digressing from the digression.

So, back to jogging. While I chose not to jog way out in rural Rwanda, here in the city of Kigali there are many joggers, and most of the ones I see are Rwandan. (And when I say "many" joggers, it's all relative: I will pass, perhaps, two joggers on average on any given morning, usually urban Rwandans). What I wanted to share is this: it is very encouraging to jog in Kigali, because whenever you pass a Rwandan jogger, s/he will usually do one of two things (and usually both):

1. clap both hands, applauding your jogging efforts. This is usually accompanied by a smile, a wide Rwandan smile that is just really hard to find anywhere else; and/or
2. shout, "Courage!" in French (which sounds like cour-AH-ge!!). The meaning is "great job!" or "keep going!"

So it's very nice. Especially when I first got here and was gasping for air, trying to adjust to the 6000 ft altitude, a little applause and a 'bon mot' went a long way to keeping me on track with my exercise plan. I wonder where the Rwandan jogging community picked up this nice encouraging habit. Imagine me doing this back in America? [Me to jogging passerby: "Courage!" with applause. Jogger: startled stare and silent look of "Freak!"] Jogging is so much more civilized in Rwanda, you know?

Alright, I just wanted to share that little slice of (urban) Rwandan life. And....I'm back to my original point. When I was jogging this morning, I was thinking about Henri Nouwen.

At first I wasn't thinking about Nouwen, exactly. I was puzzling out something in my head, kind of mulling it over and asking for guidance from God. It had to do with adventure, and God, and how much adventure He wants us to have, and what happens if we choose easy things instead of adventures. And whether or not we sometimes even use adventures to get out of things we should be doing instead. And how would we know the difference, anyways? I know, these are random things to think about, but I was wondering. Does anyone else ever have thoughts about not wanting to waste this one life we've been given? I think it's so easy to choose the safe thing sometimes; I see myself doing it over here at times. Kigali can actually be a very safe place (in the negative sense of "safe") if you make certain choices. But sometimes, "safe" is also boring, so sometimes we run from the safe when maybe we need to stay put and follow through with things sometimes. So, the bottom line of my train of thought, although I didn't realize it at the time, was "What will God think of me, and how will He treat me, if I don't do the right thing: i.e., if I choose the easy way out sometimes instead of the tough way? Or choose the tough way because I think the safe way is boring even though it might be the right choice?")

Anyhow, suddenly, a clarifying and helpful thought about this popped into my head, which is because of the Nouwen passage from my friend, copied below. And I suddenly had a measure of peace that I hadn't known a moment before...kind of like an it's-all-going-to-be-okay sense of peace. So, without further ado. Here's the passage:

“It is not so difficult to see that, in our particular world, we all have a strong desire to accomplish something. Some of us think in terms of great dramatic changes in the structure of our society. Others want at least to build a house, write a book, invent a machine, or win a trophy. And some of us seem to be content when we just do something worthwhile for someone else. But practically all of us think about ourselves in terms of our contribution to life.

But although the desire to be useful can be a sign of mental and spiritual health in our goal-oriented society, it can become the source of a paralyzing lack of self-esteem (the God-given understanding of our value as humans). More often than not, we not only desire to do meaningful things, but we often make the result of our work the criteria of our self worth.

When we start being too impressed by the result of our work, we slowly come to the erroneous conviction that life is one large scoreboard where someone is listing the points to measure our worth. And before we become aware of it, we have sold our souls to the many grade-givers. That means we are not only in the world, but of the world. Then we become what the world makes us.

We are intelligent because someone gives us a high grade. We are helpful because someone says “thanks”. We are likeable because someone likes us. And we are important because someone considers us indispensable. In short, we are worthwhile because we have success. And the more we allow accomplishments -- the results of our actions – to become the criteria of how we view ourselves, the more we are going to walk on our mental and spiritual toes, never sure if we will be able to live up to the expectations which we created by our last successes.

But to live a Christian life means to live in the world without being of it. It is in solitude that this inner freedom can grow. Jesus went to a lonely place to pray, that is, to grow in the awareness that all the power he had was given to him; that all the words he spoke came from his Father; and that all the works he did were not really his but the works of the One who had sent him.

In solitude we can slowly discover in the center of our own self: that we are not what we can conquer, but what is given to us. In solitude we can listen to the voice of Him who spoke to us before we could speak a word, who healed us before we could make any gesture to help, who set us free long before we could give love to anyone. It is in this solitude that we discover that being is more important than having, and that we are worth more than the results of our efforts.

In solitude we discover that our life is not a possession to be defended, but a gift to be shared. It’s there we recognize that the healing words we speak are not just our own, but are given to us; that the love we can express is part of a greater love; and that the new life we bring forth is not a property to cling to, but a gift to be received.”

Henri Nouwen

Okay, me again. Not too much to add to that...although there are many thoughts in there that hit me.

"All the works He did were not really His, but the works of the One Who sent Him."
"We are not what we can conquer, but what is given to us."
"Being is more important than having."
"We are worth more than the results of our efforts."
"Life is not a possession to be defended but a gift to be shared."
"The love we can express is part of a greater love."
"It is in solitude that this inner freedom can grow."

What do you think?